Have You Heard Of Upstreaming?

Whether you agree with the current culture or not, kids are quitting things more easily (and with less parent friction) than ever before.

So let’s talk about the one thing that makes or breaks retention: upstreaming.

Upstreaming is a concept from the book Upstream by Dan Heath. The idea? Solve problems before they become problems. It’s about looking ahead and addressing issues proactively rather than scrambling to fix them once they’ve already caused damage.

When it comes to martial arts schools, upstreaming means identifying and addressing the signs of a student who’s about to quit—before they quit. Our goal is to smell the smoke before the flames become an inferno and it becomes impossible to put out. 

Let’s face it, no matter how great your classes are, every parent will eventually hear this:

"I don’t want to go to martial arts because…"

"It’s too hard."
"It’s boring."
"I don’t like sweating."

This is where upstreaming comes in.

Instead of waiting for a student to disappear or for a parent to pull them out, address these feelings head-on—early, often, and with empathy.

One of the most effective tools you can use  is an email we send to parents before the student even considers quitting. It sets expectations, explains why challenges are normal, and builds trust between us and the parents.

Here’s an excerpt from the email:

Subject: I have a confession…

Your child isn’t ALWAYS going to love martial arts. There, I said it.

Yes, martial arts is fun and exciting, but—like a new toy—it’s unrealistic to expect the same joy a few months later.

Our job at [Your School] is to make things challenging. This means [Child’s Name] will probably come to you at some point and say:

• “It’s too hard.”

• “It’s boring.”

• “I don’t want to go anymore.”

But here’s the thing: If you let them quit when things are hard or boring, they’ll miss the chance to develop grit. And according to psychologist Angela Duckworth, grit is the #1 indicator of success—not IQ, athletic ability, or grades.

This kind of communication strengthens the partnership between the school and the parents. It reassures them that challenges are normal and equips them with the mindset to encourage their child to stick with martial arts.

Want the full email template?

[Click here to download my email template for free]. It’s ready to send to your students’ parents today.

Retention isn’t just about running great classes—it’s about communication.

Less churn = happier students = more recurring revenue 

As always, a 3 min read, with no fluff, all actionable strategy. 

Your Hype Man,

Matthew Brenenr 

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